June 6, 2009 Off

5 Tips to Gain Self Confidence

By in Self Help

Some people struggle with low confidence. It can be so low as to be painful and hold a person back from doing many things in life.

The longer you do not address the lack of self confidence, the worse things will get. It becomes a vicious circle of thinking poorly about yourself and thinking others think poorly of you. It begins to affect everything you do just as though you had put on dark glasses – it colors your world.

Gaining self confidence is a process that can take some time, but is certainly worth it. How can you build on it? It is a matter of changing the messages you might have been given as a child, and your self talk now.

Here are some tips to gain confidence, feel better about yourself and your situation in life.

1. Listen to what you tell yourself.

Much of what we say to ourselves, when we have low self confidence is negative. Catch what you are saying to yourself and turn it around to something positive. It may take a while, as it becomes a habit. Just start listening and then use the second tip.

2. Use positive self talk.

Talk to your self in a positive way, even if you need to talk to yourself outloud. This can be anything from affirmations, to thinking positively about your accomplishments. This helps gain self confidence.

For example, when learning something new: Maybe you say “Man, I am stupid. I just can’t get this”. Change that to: ” I have learned many challenging things in the past (then list a couple), I see other people doing this, and I can learn it too”.

3. Make A List of your good points and accomplishments.

Come on, you DO have some good points, and you have accomplished some things. Don’t be so hard on yourself.

Take some time to write a list. This will get it out on paper where you can see it. Maybe you have never really taken a look at your good points, or accomplishments. Pat yourself on the back figuratively. Good job.

4. Reference Your List

Put your list where you will see it every day. If you don’t want other people to see it, how about putting it in your sock drawer. Every day you get clean socks and can remind your self of your positive aspects to gain self confidence. If you don’t mind other people see it, put it in a prominent place. Put a mini one in your wallet to refer when away from home.

Wherever you put it, start your day out by reading the list over. Read it again in the evening.

Change your list as you need to. You may think of new positive aspects of yourself, or be able to add to your list of accomplishments.

5. If you start to feel down or overwhelmed, give yourself a talking to. Everyone goes through things in their life, what ever brought your self confidence down, is not often permanent. It will change, or time will go bye and people will forget.

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